If I Leave

from by Curtis McMurtry

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I said let me live the way I want to since I won’t live very long
but every time we fight I realize I’m in the wrong

you’re still hungry for the fire and proud of all your scars
strong as anyone will ever be
but if I lift you up so you can touch the stars
who’s gonna do the same for me

if I leave will you say you saw it coming
will you tell your friends you threw me out the door
will you say that I was never worth the trouble
will you pretend you never hoped for any more

we talk over and under each other these days
every time I try to help I realize I’m in the way

I’m too fearless to be careful, too fragile to be kind
too stubborn to admit when I agree
and even when I know you’re looking down on me with love
you looking down is all I see

if you leave will I say I saw it coming
will I tell my friends you beat me to the door
will I say that you were never worth the trouble
will I pretend I never hoped for any more
will I learn to hate the sound of my own heartbeat
will I pray it’s you whenever someone calls
I don’t want to be reduced to my possessions
this apartment won’t be home without your paintings on the walls


from The Hornet's Nest, released February 24, 2017
Curtis McMurtry- guitar, vocals
Diana Burgess- cello, vocals
Nathan Calzada- background vocals
Taylor Turner- upright bass
Evan Kaspar- pedal steel



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Curtis McMurtry Austin, Texas


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